One of the most iconic scenes in Stanley Kubrick’s movie 2001: A Space Odyssey, is where David Bowman is “negotiating” with the HAL 9000 computer to open the door of the spaceship. Hal says, “I’m sorry, Dave. I’m afraid I can’t do that.” Anyone who has argued with voice-activated “help” probably can relate to Dave.
Automation is inevitable. As the Borg Collective say in Star Trek: The Next Generation, “resistance is futile.” We seem to have a collective need to replace human processes with automated ones, sometimes without any logic.
I have wondered for years why my washing machine has to have an internet connection. Like I’m going to suddenly realize that the wash needs to be done while I’m away from home. The manufacturer does not explain how my dirty laundry is supposed to automagically get into the washer, or how the detergent will automatically load itself into the machine, or how the clean wet clothes get into the dryer on their own. But rest assured, all that missing functionality will be addressed by over-the-air software updates at the next opportunity.
One inventive company has solved one of my problems by introducing a washer that also dries clothes. Still not sure how the detergent gets in or the lint filter gets cleaned from the application on my phone, but I’m sure they are working on that.
In the late 1990s I sat through more than my fair share of marketing presentations from would-be-dot-com companies offering the next best thing since sliced bread in automated software solutions. The running joke was to count how many times the word “absolutely” would be uttered in answering any “can it do this or that” question. Of course, it couldn’t. I knew it and they knew, but you can’t sell something without promising the world, right? Early symptoms of the future “fake it till you make it” paradigm.
I am amazed that automotive product recalls seem to now be shadowed almost instantly with marketing press releases about how the problem will be solved by over-the-air software updates. This seems to be irrespective of whether the problems originate in hardware or software, or even before they understand the root causes of the problems.
I keep thinking of Dave and HAL, out there on the edge of space, negotiating, while ground controllers with a 43-minute signal lag time to Earth are irrelevantly trying to work the problem.
